I've Moved To WordPress

Hola,

Hello my loyal fashionistas. Just wanted to post on here that I've moved my blog to Wordpress. Please visit me there for your usual fun-filled posts about fashion, beauty and life. Check out the new look. The link is below:

https://annacrisblogs.wordpress.com/

Feel free to click "follow." If you're not a member of WordPress, you'll receive ONE email each time I post something new and that's it.

See you there!

Gracias,

AnnaCris <3

What Do You Bring To My Table?

Hola,

What’s the haps my lovelies? How is everyone doing? Have you all noticed the new look to my blog? Do you like it? I’m still working on it to customize it to my taste but I’m happy with it so far. It’s so “fashioney” #NewWord, and so me. ;)

Have you all had a chance to read my last post “Look At These Cool New Products?” If you haven’t, I think you should finish reading this one then go visit that post and let me know what you think. You may find something new that you’d like to try or maybe you’re already using some. Whatever the case, go have a look and give me some feedback. 

So the title of this post is a dead giveaway that I am veering off of the topic of fashion and beauty. I have my moments when I want to write about certain life issues or my own life experiences and this is one of them. I am about to go IN , so adjust your cute butts in that chair you’re sitting on and let’s do this.

“What do you bring to my table?” I have a meme saved on my phone that I love that’s worded a lil bit differently. It goes like this:

Bwahahaa… This gets me ALL the time. It’s so me. However, while this meme could probably be a future post about dating or the ever fabulous independent woman blah, blah, I’m going to use it in a different context because I’ve had it with people in general who think that they can treat you a certain way, usually completely shitty, just because they think they can and that this is acceptable. Well… It’s NOT! 

Here’s the thing… Which I thought of the other night and I meant to post it as a facebook status but alas… “I believe that the way you treat those who have NOTHING to do with what you’re going through speaks VOLUMES about your character and your personality.” You could act like or be the nicest person on earth but your attitude towards others when you have your undies in bunch says so much about you. Oh and let’s be clear, this is not about random strangers but about people you know and deal with frequently. They could be family, friends, co-workers, your boo. Basically, anyone you interact with daily.

What I’m getting at is this… I get that we all have things that bring us down. Things that maybe we don’t want to share with anyone but that are hurting us. I understand that we all have bad days. I get that any random action by another can ruin our day like maybe the jerk that cut you off on the road, you missed your train/bus and were super late to work or a meeting. If you live in New York City, lord knows we all have to deal with the HORRID morning commute with issue after issue on the trains making you even later to your destination. I understand being upset because you had a run in with an idiot which turned into an argument (people can be rude), maybe your boss yelled at you, maybe you’re having problems at home, maybe you’re having financial issues, you could be sick… I mean the list is endless. I’ve been there plenty of times but my mommy taught me at a young age never to take my shit out on innocent bystanders, and I try to live by that as much as I can. When I’m having a bad day, I always get super quiet. That’s how people know something is wrong with me. I hardly ever take my woes out on those who have nothing to do with them. However, It seems like this is a hard thing for people to be mindful of these days. Why is that? Someone enlighten me please.

I just don’t understand how people think that they have a right to treat others in such a way because they are angry, sad, hurt, etc. The killer is placing blame on someone who is not involved or is not the cause of your issue. If you didn’t handle your business and got called out on it, if you’re having personal problems, whatever the case may be, please do not take it out on the next available or the closest person to you just because you think you can. Unless the person is the direct reason for your distress, you are being extremely unfair. HOW is your situation another person’s fault? Did they directly or indirectly cause it?  If you cannot answer these questions with a yes and/or a specific reason then again, you are being unfair, spiteful and you are showing your underlying character/personality, and guess what… It’s not a nice picture. People like this are not allowed in my close circle. Why? Because these are the types that you never know what you’re going to get on any given day. They’re cool with you one day and turn into Mr. Hyde the next without cause. They drain you of positive energy. It’s too much work and I have NO patience for this BS!

I’m a firm believer of the above quote. “You get what you give.” We all know karma all too well, however, I relate this quote to every day issues. Your actions bring about the same actions… I’m not saying that we should be mean or rude. Never step down to that level with anyone unless you’re being threatened.  Whenever possible, kill people with kindness. However, there are times when kindness is not the answer. There are times when you have to put your foot down and show people that their actions are going to bring about the same in return. If they can dish it, they better be able to take it because let’s face it, life is not a one-way street. One person cannot always be the taker and another the giver. It’s got to be give and take. So anyone who thinks that they can be unkind to others, should not be surprised if they get resistance from the person in question. You get what you give…

So back to “What Do You Bring To My Table?” I have decided and so should you, that from now on people in my life, with the exception of my mommy because she’s my queen and she can do anything she wants , do not get to treat me like crap just because they think they can (btw, my mommy is always nice to me :)). Ask yourself the question “what does this person bring to MY table?” If the answer is nothing of value that you’d miss not having, if their presence has no impact and has no relevance in your life, if you do not need them to survive, then what they bring to YOUR table is of no importance and their attitude should not affect you. Let their actions guide you. If they don’t talk to you, fine. If they’re mean, ignore. If they’re distant, be distant. Let them do them. You do YOU. I don’t know about you, but I’m an expert at ignoring people. Like the above quote says “my attitude depends on you.” I will kindly brush my shoulders off, adjust this fabulous crown  on my head and keep it moving. Especially if I know that I did nothing to deserve someone’s attitude. I certainly REFUSE to kiss anybody’s ass and I’m not about to start. You should commit to doing the same. Save yourself the aggravation. Show them that two can play the game. Like I said, “if they can dish it, they better be able to take it” and some people can’t take it. Be prepared for them to be taken aback, to be shocked even or go as far as to play the victim or the innocent fool like they did nothing to deserve YOUR behavior. Regardless of this, pay them no mind. Continue your day as if you haven’t a care in the world. Trust that this will get to them more than any blow up or confrontation. It’s a good lesson and if they care or even pay attention, they will realize they’ve been unfair and may not do it again. If not, there’s always this:

Don’t take it personally. Look at the source. If they’re worth it, maybe have a talk with them in a day or two. If it’s immediate family, your love interest or a long time-friendship, definitely try and work it out with them. Those relationships are special and deserve effort. However, if in your heart you feel the person in question is irrelevant to your life’s table, I repeat…. brush your shoulders off, adjust your crown  and go about your day and try your best not to take these actions personally. ;)

So there you have it my loves. Just thought I’d share my point of view on this subject. I’m sure each of us has been in a situation like this at some point. Let me add that perhaps the person may not realize they’re doing this but that’s like a 1 out of 10 chance. Usually they pick a scapegoat and go with it so be aware how they treat you as opposed to others around them. That will be the giveaway. Then ask yourself “What does this person bring to MY table?” Whatever your answer is, act accordingly…

Alrighty then, what are your thoughts on this topic? Do you agree with me or disagree? How have you handled situations like these? Do you confront or ignore? Maybe you’re guilty of these actions. Why do you choose to handle your misfortune by treating others this way? Do you realize you’re doing this? OMG, I could ask so many more questions. In any case, you all know the drill my sweets. Share your thoughts. This could be a good discussion if you’re willing to share your stories. So go ahead and share. Let’s discuss and try to make our daily lives better.

Remember… Don’t blame innocents for your troubles. Take ownership of those troubles instead and handle them. If you’re going through something, lay low for a bit. Stop taking your problems out on people who haven’t caused them. And try your best to treat everybody with kindness because you never know what someone is going through! Plus, I’m sure you’d like to be treated as such so give what you’d like to receive. Okay, it’s time for opinions. Let’s chat. Go! #engage

Until next time…

Gracias,

AnnaCris 

Look At These Cool Beauty Products

Hola,

I know... I know it's been quite a while since I've posted anything new. I've seriously been slacking when it comes to my blog. I have so many drafts waiting to be completed but for some reason, I lost the feel for it. I had nothing but writer's block and no inspiration. I can't quite find an explanation as to why, but I am determined to keep this going regardless of how often or not so often I post so here I am just in time for spring. :)

Well then my lovely fashionistas let's keep the "spring" theme going because let's be honest, this winter has been extremely brutal to us.  As I browsed through my blog, I noticed that my beauty/spa posts have been some of the most popular so going with that flow, I've decided to make a comeback with what else? A beauty post! Because there's nothing more fun than finding awesome new products to pamper the skin with especially after the kind of winter some of us have had. Our skin gets dry, rough, super sensitive, dull, etc. We therefore need to keep it hydrated and well taken care of.

I've had lots of time to try new products these past few months. I love to experiment and see what works and what doesn't. If you've followed my blog, you know that I love all things natural and usually will find things in my kitchen to mix up and create something nourishing and wonderful. However, I also like to try some of the new products I see in my local drugstores. I have some favorite brands like Aveeno (I have super sensitive skin) and Olay, I love going to Sephora to check out their selections of all things beauty, and for my "natural fix" I adore Mountain Rose Herbs' website. Everything is natural, organic, unique and safe to use. So below are some of my new and favorite products I've been using lately. There are a bunch so get comfy, prepare to take notes and let's do this my lovelies...

COCONUT OIL:

Coconut oil has been all the rave lately. It seems like everyone is recommending it for just about everything. As a Dominican woman, I already knew about the wonders it does for your hair. It makes it grow, restores damaged hair and gives it shine. It's a great conditioner. All this is true because I've used it on my hair plenty of times through the years.

Coconut oil is wonderful as a skin moisturizer. If you have dry skin, this oil is excellent. It prevents flaking and dryness and heals the skin. It's also great as a makeup remover. You can remove all your makeup with a cotton ball, wash your face and ta daa... you're left with moisturized skin (just apply a tiny bit more after washing your face to moisturize overnight).

This oil (and I've mentioned this in my "Spa Time... How To DIY At Home" post) is fabulous to soften chapped lips. Apply to your lips at night and you'll have baby soft lips in the morning.

Lastly, and the most important one for me because I started doing this back in January, is "Oil Pulling." I kept reading about this on social media, magazines, etc. and was very curious to try it. I did my research and everybody who spoke about oil pulling pretty much said the same thing. It's great and it works. So I tried it.

I have to say while it was weird the first few times, I'm feeling it my loves. I give it two thumbs up. I mostly wanted to try it because I read that it could help with sinus problems which I have plenty of. I have nasal polyps so I suffer from everything sinus related 365 days a year. I also wanted to see if it's true that oil pulling whitens teeth. I whitened my teeth about 8 years ago and have taken very good care of them. However, since I became addicted to Starbucks [damn you Starbucks!], I've noticed they've lost their brightness. The third is cavities. While I love to gloat about not having any cavities for the last 7 years, again, I've become addicted to certain candies so I want to prevent developing cavities at any cost. So yes I've been oil pulling on and off for the past two months. I've seen some improvement in my sinus problems and my teeth are definitely whiter (no lie). I have to pay a visit to my dentist so I will get back to you on the cavity issue.

All in all, I'm glad I tried it. It's weird at first but once you get used to it, it's not so bad. Basically, you take a tablespoon of the oil and swish it in your mouth and through your teeth without swallowing. I do my oil pulling in the mornings before eating anything and while in the shower. I try to do 15-20 minutes then I spit it out (never swallow because you'll be swallowing bacteria) and brush my teeth as usual.

I purchased the above at Mountain Rose Herbs. It's preferable to use unrefined oil and organic. Here is the link if you'd like to check it out, read more and/or purchase.

https://www.mountainroseherbs.com/products/coconut-oil-unrefined/profile 

ARGAN OIL:

Argan oil has also been all the rave in the beauty world lately. This oil comes from the Moroccan Argan tree. It's rich in anti-oxidants and vitamins A and E (and you all know how much I love vitamin E as a moisturizer). I purchased this oil back in January along with the Coconut oil and have been using it ever since. It's simply fabulous!

Argan oil has so many great noticeable benefits. To name a few:

As a moisturizer - It absorbs quickly, it's not oily, it's safe to use around the eyes. I use it every night as my night time moisturizer and I see the difference.

As an exfoliator - Use with sugar or brown sugar to exfoliate your face and it'll leave you with a radiant glow.

It's great for acne, this oil can lighten dark spots (tried and tested), and it's a wonderful lip and hair conditioner as well as great for your nails/cuticles. Rub oil into your nail beds before bed to moisturize and soften your cuticles.

I'm in love with this oil! I purchased the above at Mountain Rose Herb's website as well. Below is the link if you'd like to learn more and/or purchase:

https://www.mountainroseherbs.com/products/argan-oil/profile

Side Effects: If you're allergic to nuts, please be careful when using this oil.

CLEANSING GRAINS:

While perusing Mountain Rose Herbs' website, I came across this gem. You all know how much I love the gentle exfoliation process and this is fantastic. These cleansing grains do wonders for my skin.

Again, this is made from completely organic products that consist of: organic oat bran, white kaolin clay, organic almond meal, organic rose petal power, organic corn meal and a blend of pure essential oils.

To use, pour a bit of the grains into your palm and add some warm water. Mix until it becomes a paste and gently rub into your face. Rinse with warm water. I use this once a week or every two weeks when I feel my skin needs a boost.

Here is the link with more information (If you click on this click, you will have to scroll down some until you reach the cleansing grains info):

https://www.mountainroseherbs.com/catalog/bath-body/facial-care  


LEMON BALM HYDROSOL:

Mountain Rose Herbs' Hydrosols are a less concentrated form of your typical essential oils. They are very mild and refreshing to the skin. I love this Lemon Balm Hydrosol because it's great for skin irritations. I use this after I shave to prevent razor bumps. It's also very calming so if you're in the mood for a bubble bath after a stressful day, add a few drops of this to your bath and it will soothe your senses. It's similar to aromatherapy but in a milder way. 

Here is the link (Please scroll down the page until you reach the Lemon Balm info):

https://www.mountainroseherbs.com/catalog/aromatherapy/hydrosols 



LIP BALMS:

My lips get dry so fast and so often that I MUST carry some type of moisturizer with me at all times. It's one of the things I never leave home without and I apply it throughout the day. The above lip balms are my new favorites from Mountain Rose herbs. They are made with organic herbs, oils and butters and leave your lips super smooth while conditioning and healing chapped, dry lips.

The top one (Fawn Lily Botanic) comes in five different combinations. I went with the spiced chai + coconut because I'm all into the coconut theme lately, but I am definitely going to try the others.

Here is the link to both.

https://www.mountainroseherbs.com/catalog/bath-body/facial-care

Please scroll all the way down the page for the info and you can click on the "more details" link for more information about the Fawn Lily Botanica combinations.

AVEENO POSITIVELY NOURISHING SMOOTHING BODY WASH:

I discovered this glorious product by Aveeno while looking for my Olay body wash at CVS drugstore. It's a gentle exfoliator with pomegranate, rice beads and walnut shells. I use it every day because it's really gentle and it leaves your skin feeling so smooth. Plus, it smells absolutely wonderful!

Check it out here:

http://www.aveeno.com/product/aveeno-+positively+nourishing-+smoothing+body+wash+.do?sortby=ourPicks&from=fn


AVEENO POSITIVELY AGELESS FIRMING BODY LOTION:

Of course I could not leave out a body moisturizer. This one by Aveeno as well is excellent. I've been using it since December of 2014 and I love it. I'm not sure about the skin firming deal but I like that it's not sticky or heavy and glides onto your skin. Your skin feels noticeably soft throughout the day. This also smells delicious.

Go here for more info:

http://www.aveeno.com/product/aveeno-+positively+ageless-+firming+body+lotion.do?sortby=ourPicks&from=fn



EOS HAND LOTION:

Aren't these the cutest lil things? I love these "take everywhere" hand lotions by EOS (Evolution Of Smooth). I always keep hand lotion in my bag to prevent dry hands. These are great because they're small enough to fit anywhere. I can stick this in my wristlet and be on my way. They come in three scents: Berry Blossom, Cucumber and Fresh Flowers. They really do leave your hands super smooth and it last for hours. You can find these in any drugstore near you.

BENEFIT - "THEY'RE REAL" - MASCARA:

I don't use makeup on a daily basis. I only go all out when I'm going out to an event, girl's night, date, etc. During the week and weekends if I'm going to work or running around doing errands, I only use lipstick and lip gloss and I'm out the door. However, there are times that I will do a little extra (depending on my mood) and apply some mascara just because or like I said if I'm going out on the town...

I discovered the above mascara last summer while visiting Sephora and one of my favorite brands of makeup - Benefit. It was fairly new around that time and was being advertised. I read the box and decided to try it and have been hooked on it ever since. I ADORE this mascara so much that I've even gotten a few of my girls to use it and they love it as well.

The brush is just everything! It extends your lashes to lengths you'd never imagine and it's got tiny bristles at the ends that you use to extend the tiny lashes in the corners of your eyes. It's magnificent. Yes, I said magnificent. If you haven't already tried this, please do. You'll fall in love as well.

Below are links to both Benefit and Sephora's websites:

https://www.benefitcosmetics.com/product/view/theyre-real

http://www.sephora.com/they-re-real-mascara-P289307?skuId=1343938


HONEY PERFUME BY MARC JACOBS:

So if you've read my blog post "Who Is This Blogger... AnnaCris," you'll know that I suffer from anosmia which is the loss of the sense of smell due to nasal polyps in my case. My sense of smell is not permanently gone. When my doctor prescribes certain medications to reduce inflammation, I can smell like normal. When that happens, I hit the stores in search of new fragrances that I can try. LOL for realsies! I mean I have to know that I smell great when the polyps attack.

So a few months ago I went in search of new and wonderful scents and discovered "Honey" by Marc Jacobs. It smells absolutely delicious. It doesn't make me sneeze and it has that "fresh" scent that I'm always drawn to and yes, there's honey in the mix. Plus, how CUTE is this bottle?! I purchased the gift set with the lotion and rollerball at Macy's.

SEPHORA'S EYEBROW TOUCH UP RAZOR SET:

It's interesting that about a month ago I saw on Good Morning America a piece on how shaving your face with an eyebrow razor is now a "thing" that women do to exfoliate. They say it's the BEST form of exfoliation for your face. Well what do you know... I've been doing this for a couple of years now. It started with me shaving my mustache because waxing irritated my skin. One day I decided to experiment and did my whole face and it left it so smooth and silky and it looked so clean and fresh that I started to do it more frequently. It's perfectly safe and no your hair does not grow back more coarse as is the myth.

I was buying the eyebrow razors from the drugstore but found that two out of the three that come in the set always have a dull blade and that really annoyed me because I'd have to go over the same spot several times. I decided to head to Sephora in search of a better one and found the above kit. These, while more expensive, are a lot better to use and do the trick so you don't have to continue to go over your face a second or third time which can then cause irritation. It's a great beauty secret that I'm sure not many women know about but it's worth a try.

Here is the link:

http://www.sephora.com/eyebrow-touch-up-razor-set-P136216?skuId=895490 

... The End...

Phew... That was quite a mouthful but I hope you enjoyed reading and that you'll try some of these products. I have tried all of them and as your "guinea pig" can say that they are all safe to use. We all have different types of skin so just read all the labels before buying to make sure nothing will make you react to any ingredients. Although I am very careful with what I use as I do have very sensitive skin and ridiculous allergies, what works for me may not always work for you. Usually organic products are safe but like the Argan Oil, it contains nuts so if you're allergic to nuts, this may not be the product for you.

For the products that you do decide to try, I hope that you will come back and share your experience. Let us all know your opinions, did you like or dislike, did you find any other good uses for any of these products that I did not mention (I love to experiment at home and see what else I can use something for). After all, we all just want to feel, look and be beautiful and fabulous so why not go the easy, safe and natural way?

A side note: Some of these products (like the oils, exfoliators, lip balms) will also work great for any of the gentlemen reading this post or if you're a fashionista, why not try it on your special love? I mean let's face it, men also want to look and feel great and a little pampering is always wonderful for them too.

This being said, you should all remember the drill... try out whatever has caught your interest then come back and comment below. Let us all know the outcome of this new beauty adventure. Also, if you'd like to add any new and fun products that you've discovered lately, please feel free to share in the comments and I will give you a shout out. I look forward to reading your comments. Go! #engage

Until next time...

Gracias,

AnnaCris <3

The Dreaded Set-Up...

Hola,

Hey there my fashionistas. First let my start by officially wishing all of you a very happy, healthy and prosperous new year. We are on day twenty of 2014 and I hope you are already making the best of it. As for me, yes I know that I have been slacking on my blog posts lately. I have no excuses except that I need to step my game up. On a positive note, I intend on taking my goals to the next level. I'm in search of a professional seamstress who can help me get my designs made so if anyone knows of one, please comment below with their information or email me.  My goal this year is to take this all the way and this includes being more diligent with this blog. Please bear with me and let's take this fabulous ride together.

So on that note, I thought I'd share an experience with you. It's kind of like my first "HUH" moment of this year. I'm sure the majority of you can relate to this and will chuckle along with me at my little ordeal. I imagine that the title of this post is a dead give-away for what I am about to tell you. Yes, when your friends decide to set you up with someone...

Let me begin by saying that if you know me, you know that I am not a fan of being set up on blind dates, friendly dates or any other kind of "date" that you can think of. Nine times out of ten, it never works out as you'd expect and that one time it does is very rare. So for me to have accepted this time says quite a lot in itself. I was trying to be open-minded about it and hey, it was the very last day of 2013 and who knows, maybe it was a good sign for the coming year... HAAA!! Here's how it all played out. Two very strange days to the beginning of my year:

On the afternoon of December 31st a male friend calls me at work to tell me about his co-worker who is a really nice guy, and he thinks that we have a lot in common and would I be interested in talking to him. I hesitated but again, I figured I'd be open-minded about it so in the end I said okay. When I first answered the call, we had visitors arriving for an event in the office and there were people standing around so I didn't get a chance to ask for details or a description. I quickly said just give him my work email because I was not comfortable giving my personal number or other information. So later that day I get an email from "the guy" introducing himself and he includes his number. When I get home, I text him to introduce myself and we start a conversation. He did sound like a very nice person and the conversation continued for a little while.

On New Year's Day, he sent a text early in the morning which kind of annoyed me because we're not cool like that yet, and I was still sleeping. I take my time responding (remember, I don't know what he looks like) and I keep things light. He texts throughout the day and I already felt like he was trying to take over my space plus, he was saying things like it was already a done deal that we were going to date - the bells in my head were ringing and the red flags waving. However, I'm still trying to go with it. He asks if I want to talk on the phone that night and I decline (you know, the whole taking over my space deal). 

On Thursday, January 2nd, again he texts super early in the morning and I was still asleep (now you KNOW I was super annoyed that he did it on day two!), I still had a good thirty minutes of sleep before waking up for work and he ruined it grrrr. I mean really, we are seriously NOT cool like that and yes, good morning texts are cute but only when they're from someone that you actually like and have feelings for.  Anyway, let's move to Thursday night...

I finally relent to talking on the phone and we talk for a few hours. He completely took over the conversation by telling me his whole life's story which had me thinking oh lord have mercy! Furthermore, he was just acting and talking like we were already a couple which was freaking me out. He was talking about weekend getaways and asking where I would like to move to... Wait... What?! Move to? uhh, dude, I'm fine living in New York near my family and friends what the hell?! ...and I still had NO idea what this guy looked like. Finally, I say listen did our mutual friend describe me to you? Did he say anything about me? We’ve been texting for two days and I have NO clue what you look like. He says oh yes he showed me your Facebook page. WHAT??? So all this time he already knew what I looked like and apparently, he liked what he saw while I was at a disadvantage! That's when I'd had it and said you have to at least send me a picture because I cannot continue talking to you otherwise. He said he would send one as soon as we ended the call. We hang up and I go straight to sleep because it really was super late and this whole thing was just freaking me out.

The next morning we had the snow storm in NYC, and I wake up earlier than usual to confirm that our office was closed. I then check my email and this guy sent TWO emails with a total of EIGHT photos. EIGHT! That was my first WTF moment... The next was when I opened the first two photos!

... *queue stunned face* ...

My first reaction was to blink and look again... then OH. MY. GOD! This cannot be him! I mean I expected just about anything but never, EVER this. Let's just say we were so NOT a good match even if we did have a few things in common. I was shocked that my friend would even think to set me up with this man. I mean why? How? ... My friends, my mom, my best friend's mom all had the same reaction "OH MY GOD!" Everybody said the same thing: WHY would your friend think you'd be interested in this man? It was bad people, really bad. I was caught up in my worse set-up nightmare and now what do I do? I was offended, annoyed, pissed as all hell at being put into this situation. So I turned it around to the one who got me into this mess and I told him sorry but NO. I'm not interested in your friend. There isn't and never will be any chemistry there. Let him tell the guy. I was as nice as possible but I really should have said how it was unfair that I didn't get the choice of seeing a visual of what he was getting me into while his coworker had that advantage. Had I been given that choice, I would have declined from the get go and saved us all the trouble. There was nothing else I had to say to the guy so I just did not respond. I'm pretty sure he knew that would be my reaction because he did not insist. I'm sorry but I just couldn't. I know you all are laughing at my pain. I just know it and some of you are shaking your heads at me at my reaction for punking out and not responding to the guy, but seriously... IT WAS BAD and I just couldn't proceed with it any longer! Two days wasting my time and energy, but I learned a few very good lessons.

The first lesson is one I already knew but once again ignored it which was NEVER ignore those red flags, ringing bells or whatever you want to call them. They wave and ring for a reason. I continued on with this conversation regardless of the weird signals I was getting from this man. Our intuition speaks to us often but we tend to push it aside and forge on. Trust your instincts!

Next is don't always trust your friends' judgments when it comes to their choices in dating partners for you. Unless they know you like a book, it's very likely that they will sometimes get it wrong and you'll be stuck in a position like mine. This leads me to my next lesson...

NEVER agree to a setup unless you get an honest description or you are shown a picture before you agree to this already awkward and uncomfortable situation.

The last lesson I learned was never feel bad about your standards. We all have them and they vary by person. This is not to say that the person in question is not a really nice individual, but never disregard what you look for, what you want and need from the person you are going to date because you don't want to hurt their feelings or your friend's feelings. I agonized all day trying to find a nice way to tell my friend "WTF were you thinking!" Then I agonized on whether I should tell the guy sorry but I'm not interested or just let it be because again, I didn't want to hurt anybody's feelings. One of my best friends, Melissa, can tell you that I spent the whole day going back and forth with her, her mom and my mom trying to figure out the best way to get myself out of this craziness without being too harsh. The thing is, I was worried but my friend not so much. He was just like "no big deal, handle as you see fit." Which was not a really great response from him given that he got me into this mess but that being said, I then saw fit to remove myself from this situation, ignore the guy and keep it moving. I didn't owe him anything because we only chatted and talked on the phone for a total of two days. There were no promises made and no investment on either part. I feel like my friend should have handled this a lot better. I get that he had good intentions towards me, but he definitely went about it completely wrong from beginning to end.

So to the rest of my friends I say this:

PLEASE no matter how much you think you're doing something good for me, I beg you to please give me all the details, descriptions and most important show pictures BEFORE going ahead and setting me up with anybody. Ultimately, it's my decision on whether I want to go through with this as well as whether I will date someone, but it just saves us all the trouble of being caught up in a very horrifying and awkward situation.

I am perfectly fine being single so don't think that I am going out of my mind because I'm not dating anyone or haven't found the one to make me melt into little puddles of mush. Don't think that I will settle for just anyone for the sake of being with someone because they are "really nice." I will never do that. Just like love is not enough, being really nice is not enough either. There is so much more that plays into this relationship game.

We all have standards on what we are looking for in a partner, and while I'm not extremely picky (well maybe just a little lol) or set in my ways and am willing to make certain exceptions, I do need to like what I see. I need to feel attracted and feel that chemistry with someone. Otherwise, it will never work. Everybody has their own definition of beauty; we each have different tastes and likes and are attracted to different people. What one considers beautiful, another person doesn't, but we all have our tastes in what we look for in a partner. We all tend to kid ourselves thinking "oh but it's what's on the inside that counts." That's all good and true in the long run, but the truth of it all is that when you FIRST SEE somebody on the street, on the bus, at a bar or restaurant, what attracts you to them is what you SEE. What we see is what makes our heads turn, what makes us say damn look at that guy or that girl; it's what makes you want to talk to them and get to know them better. Do not kid yourselves thinking otherwise. This, my darlings is what the beginning of any relationship is about. You liked what you saw and you pursued it, you got to know them, liked them even more and boom... It's the start of something that could be really beautiful if the feelings are mutual. Nevertheless, what started that something "beautiful," was the attraction you felt when you first SAW that person.

Consequently, my nightmare ended on that snowy Friday on January 3rd. I was actually relieved because I already knew it would never work (those red flags and ringing bells again). He was already taking over my space and time and we didn't even know each other. So my journey to find that special someone continues but in the mean-time, I am quite happy being single. I have so many things to focus on and wonderful friends and family to spend time with that there is no void of not having a special someone right now (well there is on some occasions of course, but I'm not stressing over it). When the right person shows up, I will know. However, I refuse to settle and I refuse to get myself involved with someone I feel nothing for just for the sake of having a boyfriend. I love myself too much to deprive myself of that wonderful relationship with someone who when I look at him, he makes my heart beat faster and brings that smile to my face and joy to my life. Someone I can talk to forever and the more we talk, the more I like. Someone who is the person I want to share not only the good times with but also the bad. Someone who awakens feelings in me that I don't even know I have. Just someone who will come into my world to enhance it even more than it already is, and that this someone feels the same way about me... *sighs* :)

So that, my loves, was the beginning of my year. I know you're laughing, smirking, maybe even judging my reactions. Whatever the case may be, you already know the drill. Please feel free to comment respectfully below with your opinions or perhaps you'd like to share one of your horror stories. I'm sure you've all been in my shoes at least once in your lives. Let's compare. How did you handle your situation? How horrified were you? Did you continue on for the sake of not hurting someone's feelings? Let's discuss because in the end we have to look at this as a learning experience for the next one... Go! #engage

Until next time...

Gracias,
AnnaCris <3

Note: Don't forget my dears that if you know of a good, responsible and professional seamstress, please comment below or email me contact info to discuss a wonderful project. Thank you. 

When Friends Become Family...

Hola,

How is everyone doing? I'm hoping that with my last post "Style Is What You Do With It," you all got to know the person behind this blog a little better. That you got to know my fashion style and tastes, and that perhaps some of us have something in common. I would love it if you went back to that post and shared yours with me. Give me some insight on your style and/or what you find is missing in the fashion world that could make you more fabulous than you already are. :)

So my loves, in this post I'd like to veer off of the subject of fashion and instead talk about FAMILY. Yes, that wonderful word that brings to mind unconditional love, loyalty, support, unity and so many other positive emotions. Family, and I'm of course referring to "blood relatives," are really some of the most important people in our lives. We learn to love because of them, we learn our core values, morals and principles because of them as well. Our parents teach us all these things in our early years. They are the key to how we are raised. Our first interactions when we're born are with our parents, grandparents, siblings, aunts, uncles and cousins. They become some of the people we love the most throughout our lives. Our cousins can easily become our first best friends. We grow to cherish our family and turn to them in times of need, during happy and sad times. There is nothing sweeter than a family that is united.

Yes, the love of a family is incomparable. Whether the family is large or small, it does not matter. What matters is the bond. There are so many lovely families in the world that get along no matter what goes wrong. They know how to put differences aside and resolve their issues.  These are beautiful families that support each other in everything. When one needs help, they all unite and support, when one has a dream, the family pitches in and makes it come true. One of the most amazing things to me is hearing stories about a family-owned business and how the family got together and made it happen then passed it on from generation to generation; or how someone lost their job and the family got together to help out until the person was back on their feet. There are so many great stories of support and unity. If you have this connection with your blood relatives, I beg you to cherish it and maintain it no matter what. It is one of the most important and sought after relationships.

So what happens when that familial structure changes and not in a positive way? What happens when you grow up and you realize you have nothing in common with one of your siblings, one or both of your parents aren't all they should be (because let's face it, not everyone is cut out to be a parent), the fights begin within the family because of gossip, instigators and lies spread that can sometimes be irreparable? The once unified family as we saw it begins to deteriorate, breakdown and yes, it breaks up. What do you do then? Who becomes that loyal support system that we all need?...

FRIENDS!!

Yes, FRIENDS! Another wonderful word that brings to mind unconditional love, loyalty, support, unity and so many other positive emotions. There is a quote that I love that says:

...I believe this to be the absolute truth. There is no doubt that we all have that friend or friends who we consider part of our family, if not more than. Isn't this a wonderful thing? When we find those people that you know in your heart are the realest of the real, your heart soars and is at peace because you have made that special connection that will be everlasting. You've found that person you can count on, turn to, trust with your life, secrets, hopes and dreams and know that they support you and believe in you 100%, that person you can spend time with and just be yourself with, the one who you can completely let go with and just be crazy, those friends who you can laugh hysterically with over the silliest things... That, my dears is also called being "FAMILY." I mean, if not for that friend or friends, we'd be a bunch of lonely souls with nobody to turn to when we feel we've lost that primary family connection.

FRIENDS! We all have them. You just have to know which ones are real enough to call them family. Which ones will stand the test of time? Which ones can you ultimately trust with your feelings, emotions and best kept secrets? Which of these friends will be there for you no matter what, no matter how crazy you drive them or how many stupid things you do? Those that are willing to stick around regardless of your flaws are those friends that become your family.

Keep in mind that sometimes we out-grow some of our friends. This is not terribly bad because they can still be a part of your life just not as close as you were. This is sad but people change, their lives change (marriage, kids, careers, etc.) and you may no longer have much in common. When we out-grow certain friends, we are making room for the new ones that God is about to put in our paths. Haven't you ever met someone and instantly "clicked" with them? In a matter of minutes you've shared quite a lot about yourself with this "stranger" and before you know it, you exchange phone numbers, you start texting, you become Facebook and Twitter friends, and you invite each other to outings, the movies and OMG shopping! :)... Mmmhmm, I've just described what can be the beginning of a beautiful friendship. This could be something that may have been missing in your life without you knowing it. These are the little miracles we live for, and are so grateful and thankful for when they happen. Friends are blessings and angels in disguise that are sent to us to fill a void, to comfort, love, understand, support, laugh and cry with, to share our lives with and expand our horizons. They can teach us new things and see our problems in a different light and thereby, making us feel better. Friends are simply the best and that is why we come to consider some of them our "best friends" and then are considered our "family." 

It's happened to me a few times, and it is just the most wonderful occurrence. I never thought I'd have such amazing people in my life as I have now. Most of them are friends who I now see as my family. Most of them I haven't even known for that long and some I've known for years, but they are very important in my life. I just adore them to pieces and I thank God for sending each of them to me at just the right moments. They offer support, they help me and most important, they believe in me. I may not have many blood relatives that I can count on and share my life with, and I am thankful for the few that I do have because they are awesome (ahem, my mommy - lol), but my friends make up for that missing bond. My "girls" are amazing (and wow, I now have several amazing guy friends as well). I am so lucky to have all of them in my life and for that I say thank you. I am at a place in my life where I don't need a million friends just a bunch that I know are sincere and I know I can count on. They give me love and I give it right back, and I honestly feel like I've finally cultivated a "harvest of friends" who I can now call my "FAMILY."

So there you have it. This is my take on a very important subject in all of our lives. If you agree or disagree with my views, please feel absolutely free to comment respectfully below and share your opinions. This is really a lovely topic to discuss and it's even lovelier when you can say you have a little bit of both. So I encourage you to please comment your story. To end this post, I'd like for you to go ahead and reflect on those people in your lives, your family and your friends and think which ones fall into any of the positive descriptions above. I hope you'll need more than ten fingers to count because that would mean that you, my dear, are truly blessed!

Until next time...

Gracias,

AnnaCris <3